This photo shows the fiendish Crystalbonce. He may look like a bulldog clip balanced on an inverted tealight with a yellow crystal for a head, but I assure you that Crystalbonce is an extremely suave and dastardly robotic being. He's French and his fearsome cry of "C'est pour toi que je suis!" has been known to strike terror even into the unbeating hearts of golems. Which is unfortunate for the hero of the book I've just started writing...
Twisthorn Bellow is an animated clay statue who accidentally falls into a vat of nitro-glycerin, turning him into a living stick of dynamite. He can't use deodorant: his sweat is too risky for that. Together with his sidekicks, Hapi Daze (a giant hand that clicks its fingers to perform feats of telekinesis) and Miss Abortia Stake (a sentient embryo with the power to induce fits of weeping), the morally ambiguous Twisthorn fights real or imagined paranormal threats and conspiracies everywhere. His weapon of choice is a Nubian kpinga, partly because he's an ethnological snob.
Apart from Crystalbonce, his many enemies include the inverted gangster Upside Downey Jr, the were-clown Guttersnipe Chutney, the entire government of France, and Philip José Farmer... Twisthorn has only one mandate: the smashing of unspeakable phenomena! He must battle against vampires, demons, gargoyles, musicians, lamiae, chimeras, basilisks, moths and sundry French things in order to preserve his reputation and maybe earn a knighthood from the Queen. Can he do it? Will he ever be published if he does? I just don't know!
Twisthorn Bellow is an animated clay statue who accidentally falls into a vat of nitro-glycerin, turning him into a living stick of dynamite. He can't use deodorant: his sweat is too risky for that. Together with his sidekicks, Hapi Daze (a giant hand that clicks its fingers to perform feats of telekinesis) and Miss Abortia Stake (a sentient embryo with the power to induce fits of weeping), the morally ambiguous Twisthorn fights real or imagined paranormal threats and conspiracies everywhere. His weapon of choice is a Nubian kpinga, partly because he's an ethnological snob.
Apart from Crystalbonce, his many enemies include the inverted gangster Upside Downey Jr, the were-clown Guttersnipe Chutney, the entire government of France, and Philip José Farmer... Twisthorn has only one mandate: the smashing of unspeakable phenomena! He must battle against vampires, demons, gargoyles, musicians, lamiae, chimeras, basilisks, moths and sundry French things in order to preserve his reputation and maybe earn a knighthood from the Queen. Can he do it? Will he ever be published if he does? I just don't know!